sleepy

dennys:

sprawlerr:

why does dennys have a tumblr

why do you

(Source: rabbitling)


kimpissible:

when your mom says no to mcdonalds

image


chocolaty:

barack ohana
How the Logic of "Friendzoning" Would Work If Applied in Other Instances:
  • *Man walks into a store and finds employee*
  • Man: Alright, I've had enough. Why haven't you guys hired me?!
  • Employee: Uh...well sir, when did you put in your application?
  • Man: I never filled out an application.
  • Employee: Well sir, we can't consider you for employment if you've never filled out an application.
  • Man: No, that's bullshit, because I've been coming here for years now, and every single time I tell you all how much I love this store and how much I appreciate your customer service, unlike some of your other customers might I add!
  • Employee: Well, but that doesn't-
  • Man: AND I even told you that I didn't have a job!
  • Employee: But sir, that doesn't indicate to us that you would like a job at our store. And again, if you've never filled out an application, we can't consider you. Besides, we're not hiring.
  • Man: OH! Not hiring, HA! What a laugh. I see your store go through seasonal workers all the time. They come and go like nothing, but you won't consider me as a part-time employee even though I KNOW you've been looking for workers to fill positions? That's insane!
  • Employee: Sir, we've been looking to hire a few people for management positions. Do you have any management experience?
  • Man: Well no, but what does that matter?
  • Employee: ...Well sir, that's what we're looking for. You won't be suitable for the position without management experience.
  • Man: Oh that's such a load of crap. You know, you'll be waiting around a long time for a manager if you don't lower your standards a little. Who cares if someone knows how to manage a store? I LOVE this store and I'm willing to work here, that's all that should matter to you.
  • Employee: That...doesn't make any sense.
  • Man: NO! I'm done. This is over. From now on, no more Mr. Nice Guy.
  • Employee:
  • Man:
  • Employee:
  • Man: Fuck you, slut.

Would You Rather - the One Direction Edition
  • Please put a number in my ask box! I'm getting bored
  • Would you rather...
  • 1: ...get high with Zayn, or drunk with Niall?
  • 2: ...get a tattoo every time Zayn does - it doesn't matter what you get, just something - or get one tattoo that is identical to his in the same place?
  • 3: ...actually date one of the boys, or beard for your OTP?
  • 4: ...read a really graphic fanfiction, all the while pretending you wrote it, out loud to your parents or the boys?
  • 5: ...show the boys everything on your blog, or have Harry start straightening his hair?
  • 6: ...ban Liam from wearing shirts or Louis from wearing loose pants?
  • 7: ...direct and shoot any type of photoshoot you want, or direct and shoot their next music video?
  • 8: ...have a one night stand with Harry, or a proper dinner-and-movie date with Niall?
  • 9: ...be serenaded by Zayn or have Liam write you a love letter?
  • 10: ...date Liam and be known as a homewrecker (for breaking Team Payzer up, even though you didn't), or date Louis normally but when you break up he writes a hurtful (read: sassy) song about you for their next album and have everyone know it's about you?
  • 11: ...have Harry do one of his infamous lyric changes to anything you want, or be tweeted by Liam?
  • 12: ...get sassily called out by Louis via DM, or have Niall make vague, passive aggressive tweets about you?
  • 13: ...have Zayn give you a hair tutorial or Louis give you a make-up tutorial?
  • 14: ...be all the boys' friend (nothing more) or date one of them?
  • 15: ...break one of the boys' hearts to the point where the band takes a year's hiatus, or live happily ever after with him but the band splits for good?
  • 16: ...be able to read Harry's mind when he stares at Louis, or Louis' when he stares at Eleanor?
  • 17: ...have a movie marathon with Liam or go planking with Niall?
  • 18: ...have all of the boys thrown into the Hunger Games and whoever lives dates you, or be thrown into the HG yourself, with 75 other Directioners, and the last five get to date a boy each?
  • 19: ...know the full meaning behind Harry's gay new tattoo, or his old gay one?
  • 20: ...spank Lou or run your hand through Zayn's quiff?
  • 21: ...streak through Times Square with Harry, or do Niall's version of the worm at the Presidential Inauguration?
  • 22: ...tattoo Zayn - and no matter what it comes out like, he HAS to keep it - or push Harry down a flight of stairs and never get the chance to explain yourself?
  • 23: ...walk/run like Louis, or dance like Harry during X Factor?
  • 24: ...talk like Billy Mays, or sing like Liam during his 2010 audition?
  • 25: ...give Harry a haircut like Skrillex, or dump glue over Niall's hair immediately followed by feathers?
  • 26: ...do a twitcam with Liam, or guest star in the next episode of The Adventurous Adventures of One Direction?
  • 27: ...host Megamind and ask your own questions, or have there be an old video diary on the stairs, but you can't get involved?
  • 28: ...have Niall teach you guitar, or Josh teach you drums?
  • 29: ...do the cinnamon challenge in front of the boys, winning a date with one of them if you succeed, or get to watch them do it?
  • 30: ...watch the boys on Silent Library, or watch them on Wipeout?
  • 31: ...attend the wedding of your OTP, or get a copy of their sex tape?
  • 32: ...accidentally sneeze all over Zayn at a meet 'n' greet, or get yelled at by security in front of them?
  • 33: ...play Truth or Dare with the boys, and answer all truths, or do all dares?
  • 34: ...pull a name from a hat to see which member has to shave their head, or pick which one?
  • 35: ...go mini golfing with Louis or to the pool with Liam?
  • 36: ...have a nerf gun battle with the boys, or go with them to LaserQuest?
  • 37: ...ask one boy any ten questions you want, or ask each boy one question (and everyone has to answer truthfully in either case)?
  • 38: ...have Larry break up, or the band?
  • 39: ...show the boys all of your texts and messages, or have them listen in to your and your friends talking about them?

myshibear:

i am not in love with you.

i am in love with the idea of you.

and honestly, that is the worst way to love someone.


legalwifi:

legalwifi:

hola guess what i’m watchin

whats wrong with you all

image

image


  • me: i'm going shopping do you want something?
  • friend: nah, i'm fine
  • *arrives*
  • me: *eating cookies*
  • friend: give me one
  • me: are you fuckin kidding with me

rabioheab:

redmosaic:

rabioheab:

Best Insults To Use In Fight

  • doodoohead
  • nerd
  • dingus
  • you stink
  • where are you from, loser? are you from losertown because you’re a loser (please only use this if you want to mentally destroy your opponent)
  • Diaper Man

Nerd is never an insult. Nerd is a badge of honour!

shut up nerd


religiousmom:

do you ever wanna listen to music but every song is just not the right song


100 Reasons NOT To Kill Yourself
  • 1. We would miss you.
  • 2. It’s not worth the regret. Either by yourself if you failed or just simply left scars, or the regret everyone else feels by not doing enough to help you.
  • 3. It does get better. Believe it or not it will eventually get better. Sometimes you have to go through the storm to get to the rainbow.
  • 4. There’s so much you would miss out on doing.
  • 5. There is always a reason to live. It might not be clear right now, but it is always there.
  • 6. So many people care, and it would hurt them if you hurt yourself.
  • 7. You ARE worth it. Don’t let anyone, especially yourself, tell you otherwise.
  • 8. You are amazing.
  • 9. A time will come, once you’ve battled the toughest times of your life and are in ease once again, where you will be so glad that you decided to keep on living. You will emerge stronger from this all, and won’t regret your choice to carry on with life. Because things always get better.
  • 10. What about all the things you’ve always wanted to do? What about the things you’ve planned, but never got around to doing? You can’t do them when you’re dead.
  • 11. I love you. Even if only one person loves you, that’s still a reason to stay alive.
  • 12. You won’t be able to listen to music if you die.
  • 13. Killing yourself is never worth it. You’ll hurt both yourself and all the people you care about.
  • 14. There are so many people that would miss you, including me.
  • 15. You’re preventing a future generation, YOUR KIDS, from even being born.
  • 16. How do you think your family would feel? Would it improve their lives if you died?
  • 17. You’re gorgeous, amazing, and to someone you are perfect.
  • 18. Think about your favourite music artist, you’ll never hear their voice again…
  • 19. You’ll never have the feeling of walking into a warm building on a cold day
  • 20. Listening to incredibly loud music
  • 21. Being alive is just really good.
  • 22. Not being alive is really bad.
  • 23. Finding your soulmate.
  • 24. Red pandas
  • 25. Going to diners at three in the morning.
  • 26. Really soft pillows.
  • 27. Eating pizza in New York City.
  • 28. Proving people wrong with your success.
  • 29. Watching the jerks that doubted you fail at life.
  • 30. Seeing someone trip over a garbage can.
  • 31. Being able to help other people.
  • 32. Bonfires.
  • 33. Sitting on rooftops.
  • 34. Seeing every single country in the world.
  • 35. Going on roadtrips.
  • 36. You might win the lottery someday.
  • 37. Listening to music on a record player.
  • 38. Going to the top of the Eiffel Tower.
  • 39. Taking really cool pictures.
  • 40. Literally meeting thousands of new people.
  • 41. Hearing crazy stories.
  • 42. Telling crazy stories.
  • 43. Eating ice cream on a hot day.
  • 44. More Harry Potter books could come out, you never know.
  • 45. Travelling to another planet someday.
  • 46. Having an underwater house.
  • 47. Randomly running into your hero on the street.
  • 48. Having your own room at a fancy hotel.
  • 49. Trampolines.
  • 50. Think about your favourite movie, you’ll never watch it again.
  • 51. Think about the feeling of laughing out loud in a public place because your best friend has just sent you an inside joke,
  • 52. Your survival will make the world better, even if it’s for just one person or 20 or 100 or more.
  • 53. People do care.
  • 54. Treehouses
  • 55. Hanging out with your soul mate in a treehouse
  • 55. Snorting when you laugh and not caring who sees
  • 56. I don’t even know you and I love you.
  • 57. I don’t even know you and I care about you.
  • 58. Because nobody is going to be like you ever, so embrace your uniqueness!
  • 59. You won’t be here to experience the first cat world emperor.
  • 60. WHAT ABOUT FOOD?! YOU’LL MISS CHOCOLATE AND ALL THE OTHER NOM THINGS!
  • 61. Starbucks.
  • 62. Hugs.
  • 63. Stargazing.
  • 64. You have a purpose, and it’s up to you to find out what it is.
  • 65. You’ve changed somebody’s life.
  • 66. Now you could change the world.
  • 67. You will meet the person that’s perfect for you.
  • 68. No matter how much or how little, you have your life ahead of you.
  • 69. You have the chance to save somebody’s life.
  • 70. If you end your life, you’re stopping yourself from achieving great things.
  • 71. Making snow angels.
  • 72. Making snowmen.
  • 73. Snowball fights.
  • 74. Life is what you make of it.
  • 75. Everybody has a talent.
  • 76. Laughing until you cry.
  • 77. Having the ability to be sad means you have the ability to be happy.
  • 78. The world would not be the same if you didn’t exist.
  • 79. Its possible to turn frowns, upside down
  • 80. Be yourself, don’t take anyone’s shit, and never let them take you alive.
  • 81. Heroes are ordinary people who make themselves extraordinary. Be your own hero.
  • 82. Being happy doesn’t mean that everything is perfect. It means that you’ve decided to look beyond the imperfections.
  • 83. One day your smile will be real.
  • 84. Having a really hot, relaxing bath after a stressful day.
  • 85. Lying on grass and laughing at the clouds.
  • 86. Getting completely smashed with your best friends.
  • 87. Eating crazy food.
  • 88. Staying up all night watching your favourite films with a loved one.
  • 89. Sleeping in all day.
  • 90. Creating something you’re proud of.
  • 91. You can look back on yourself 70 years later and being proud you didn’t commit
  • 92. Being able to meet your Internet friends.
  • 93. Tea / Coffee / Hot Chocolate
  • 94. Sherlock season three.
  • 95. Cuddling under the stars.
  • 96. Being stupid in public because you just can.
  • 97. If you are reading this then you are alive! Is there any more reason to smile?
  • 98. being able to hug that one person you havent seen in years
  • 99. People care enough about you and your future to come up with 100 reasons for you not to do this.
  • 100. But, the final and most important one is, just, being able to experience life. Because even if your life doesn’t seem so great right now, literally anything could happen
  • IF that isn’t enough:
  • Depression Hotline: 1-630-482-9696
  • Suicide Hotline: 1-800-784-8433
  • LifeLine: 1-800-273-8255
  • Trevor Project: 1-866-488-7386
  • Sexuality Support: 1-800-246-7743
  • Eating Disorders Hotline: 1-847-831-3438
  • Rape and Sexual Assault: 1-800-656-4673
  • Grief Support: 1-650-321-5272
  • Runaway: 1-800-843-5200, 1-800-843-5678, 1-800-621-4000
  • Exhale: After Abortion Hotline/Pro-Voice: 1-866-4394253
  • Child Abuse: 1-800-422-4453
  • UK Helplines:
  • Samaritans (for any problem): 08457909090 e-mail jo@samaritans.org
  • Childline (for anyone under 18 with any problem): 08001111
  • Mind infoline (mental health information): 0300 123 3393 e-mail: info@mind.org.uk
  • Mind legal advice (for people who need mental-health related legal advice): 0300 466 6463 legal@mind.org.uk
  • b-eat eating disorder support: 0845 634 14 14 (only open Mon-Fri 10.30am-8.30pm and Saturday 1pm-4.30pm) e-mail: help@b-eat.co.uk
  • b-eat youthline (for under 25’s with eating disorders): 08456347650 (open Mon-Fri 4.30pm - 8.30pm, Saturday 1pm-4.30pm)
  • Cruse Bereavement Care: 08444779400 e-mail: helpline@cruse.org.uk
  • Frank (information and advice on drugs): 0800776600
  • Drinkline: 0800 9178282
  • Rape Crisis England & Wales: 0808 802 9999 1(open 2 - 2.30pm 7 - 9.30pm) e-mail info@rapecrisis.org.uk
  • Rape Crisis Scotland: 08088 01 03 02 every day, 6pm to midnight
  • India Self Harm Hotline: 00 08001006614
  • India Suicide Helpline: 022-27546669
  • Kids Help Phone (Canada): 1-800-668-6868, Free and available 24/7
  • suicide hotlines;
  • Argentina: 54-0223-493-0430
  • Australia: 13-11-14
  • Austria: 01-713-3374
  • Barbados: 429-9999
  • Belgium: 106
  • Botswana: 391-1270
  • Brazil: 21-233-9191
  • China: 852-2382-0000
  • (Hong Kong: 2389-2222)
  • Costa Rica: 606-253-5439
  • Croatia: 01-4833-888
  • Cyprus: 357-77-77-72-67
  • Czech Republic: 222-580-697, 476-701-908
  • Denmark: 70-201-201
  • Egypt: 762-1602
  • Estonia: 6-558-088
  • Finland: 040-5032199
  • France: 01-45-39-4000
  • Germany: 0800-181-0721
  • Greece: 1018
  • Guatemala: 502-234-1239
  • Holland: 0900-0767
  • Honduras: 504-237-3623
  • Hungary: 06-80-820-111
  • Iceland: 44-0-8457-90-90-90
  • Israel: 09-8892333
  • Italy: 06-705-4444
  • Japan: 3-5286-9090
  • Latvia: 6722-2922, 2772-2292
  • Malaysia: 03-756-8144
  • (Singapore: 1-800-221-4444)
  • Mexico: 525-510-2550
  • Netherlands: 0900-0767
  • New Zealand: 4-473-9739
  • New Guinea: 675-326-0011
  • Nicaragua: 505-268-6171
  • Norway: 47-815-33-300
  • Philippines: 02-896-9191
  • Poland: 52-70-000
  • Portugal: 239-72-10-10
  • Russia: 8-20-222-82-10
  • Spain: 91-459-00-50
  • South Africa: 0861-322-322
  • South Korea: 2-715-8600
  • Sweden: 031-711-2400
  • Switzerland: 143
  • Taiwan: 0800-788-995
  • Thailand: 02-249-9977
  • Trinidad and Tobago: 868-645-2800
  • Ukraine: 0487-327715

feat:

do you ever get sad over something that happened a long time ago because i do